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abvjTitle: So Worth the Fight
Summary: At the end of the day nothing else matters.
Rating: pg
Author's Notes: 1,313 words. Set circa season five. AU for anything past, like, 5x17. This is so not my sandbox anymore, so con-crit is both welcome and appreciated.
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lexiesloan.
There is an offer somewhere down the line.
Sometime after she’s progressed from intern to resident, twenty-four to twenty-five, another year older, more lessons learned. There is an offer, some doctor filling in as head of cardio because the Chief hasn’t found a permanent replacement and it’s still a constant revolving door, still believed to be cursed, and she slips a card into Lexie’s hand and smiles broadly.
“You’re a good doctor,” she says, and Lexie beams proudly because even though she knows (call it self-centeredness, call it being conceited, but Lexie was born to be a doctor and out of all the things in her life that have come to pass, it is the only thing she has ever been one-hundred percent sure of.) it’s still nice to hear aloud. An affirmation of sorts that a person never thinks they need until it’s offered their way. There’s a card in the woman’s hand, pristine white in color with black scrawl on the back and Lexie takes it gladly. “If you are ever in New York give me a call. We would love to have you, Dr. Grey.”
Lexie smiles quietly and blushes her thanks and that’s that.
It’s funny, she’ll think later, because she hadn’t even really done anything at all spectacular that day. It had been a difficult case, sure, a medical mystery of sorts and she may have saved the day with some sort of tidbit of information she’d had floating around in her head (perks of having a photographic memory) but mostly she had kept her head down and did her job the best way she knew how. She scrubbed in, assisted during the surgery, and it was just like any other day at Seattle Grace, nothing particularly out of the ordinary.
It’s always been there, the idea of leaving Seattle behind, leaving the gloom and rain for sunshine and a different (better) life. But at first there was always her father and his problems that were suddenly made her problems the day Molly had looked at her and said I just can’t. The day Lexie decided to play the role of big sister the best she knew how and said don’t worry and had understand, sort of, that things like babies and husbands outweighed others. Lexie had understood and did what she did best and took it in stride. Kept moving with one foot in front of the other. While the adjustment had been initially difficult, an uphill battle of sorts as she struggled to find her footing in this brand new world that didn’t seem to hold a place for her, it eventually became better with time. Somewhere down the line Meredith had started to acknowledge her with something other than utter distaste, she made friends and developed relationships with people other than George, Mark came along and changed just about everything. For the most part things in this moment are looking up.
For the most part she’s happy.
“You’re in a good mood.”
She’s sitting on the edge of the bed, TV on low in the background, toeing her shoes off. She smiles towards Mark softly and pulls her sweater over her head, tossing it to the side. In the back of her mind she’s entertaining the idea. The plausibility of it all. She wonders, fleetingly, if she asked him to pick up everything, if she asked him to give up his life here and move across the country, for her, what he would say. What exactly it is that he would do. They had talked about it sometime before, somewhere in the beginning, maybe, when they bonded over their mutual distaste for Seattle, over the fact that they never really came here on their own free will, over the fact that it was because of somebody, because of something.
“I got offered a job today,” she says quietly, falling backwards on the bed. He’s leaning against the doorway of the bathroom and when she turns her head to look over at him he is raising an eyebrow. She hadn’t even intended on telling him, hadn’t really intended on telling anyone, and she hates the way the words fall out of her mouth, the way his mouth presses into a frown.
“What do you mean you got offered a job?”
“Dr. Roberts said that if I ever moved to New York I should look her up.” Lexie pushes herself upwards and uses her toes to push her socks off her feet. “So not really a job offer,” she amends, and Mark is crossing the room towards her. He sighs. She thinks it may be something similar to relief, but she isn’t sure. “But still.”
There’s a pause and he hesitates and Lexie knows he’s choosing his words carefully. He does this with her sometimes, still, even after all this time. She doesn’t know what it’ll take to get him to realize he doesn’t need to filter himself with her. She loves him as is.
Finally he smiles, wide and brilliant as he stands in front of her now. “You did have a good day.”
Reaching forward she hooks her thumbs through the front loops of his jeans. She smiles up at him in appreciation. “You know what would make it even better?”
Mark is laughing when she kisses him and her grin curves against his as she leans back on the bed again, pulling him with her. There is the mutual arching of backs, the skin sliding against skin. Later, maybe, as they’re falling asleep he will whisper something akin to I’m proud of you and she will smile and breathe and count his breaths as she falls asleep.
In the morning she will take the card and shove it the back of one of her drawers. It will remain mixed in with her panties and socks, under camisoles and her gym shorts. It will serve as a reminder of sorts, another affirmation, concrete this time. Lexie will carry it with her, an acknowledgement that Meredith isn’t the only Grey going places; a vague notion of what could be if she truly wanted it.
And for then, right then, it’s enough.
___
Things happen after that in rather quick succession.
Two days later the competition for the sparkle pager commences. Lexie lives and breathes the hospital and medicine, lives day to day praying for a medical mystery, sleeps in the on-call room and functions mostly from cup of coffee to cup of coffee. Two weeks after that Meredith hands it over to her, all shuffling feet and stuttering in the most non-ceremonial way possible, but in the end, after, Meredith smiles and there is almost a hint of pride lingering in the background somewhere and Lexie can’t help but take stock in it.
In the end, she smiles back.
A few months after that she is the first to land a solo surgery, an appendectomy (the irony is noted) and she is flawless, methodical almost, and it goes perfectly.
After, she peels her gloves off one by one, looks up and see’s Mark watching from the galley, lips curling into a proud smile. Later, there are drinks, and after that they have victory sex in the shower all smiles and giggles and whispered declarations. In bed, as she straddles the edge between consciousness and sleep she realizes, vaguely, that her life right now, in this moment, is pretty much as close to perfect as it is ever going to be. She has her job, Mark, and her father is trying his hand at therapy, at something similar to sobriety and things are the best they’ve been in a long, long time.
Lexie sighs something soft, something wistful and Mark presses his lips somewhere near the nape of her neck.
There is the smallest smile playing at the corners of her mouth when she finally falls asleep.
Summary: At the end of the day nothing else matters.
Rating: pg
Author's Notes: 1,313 words. Set circa season five. AU for anything past, like, 5x17. This is so not my sandbox anymore, so con-crit is both welcome and appreciated.
For
lexiesloan. There is an offer somewhere down the line.
Sometime after she’s progressed from intern to resident, twenty-four to twenty-five, another year older, more lessons learned. There is an offer, some doctor filling in as head of cardio because the Chief hasn’t found a permanent replacement and it’s still a constant revolving door, still believed to be cursed, and she slips a card into Lexie’s hand and smiles broadly.
“You’re a good doctor,” she says, and Lexie beams proudly because even though she knows (call it self-centeredness, call it being conceited, but Lexie was born to be a doctor and out of all the things in her life that have come to pass, it is the only thing she has ever been one-hundred percent sure of.) it’s still nice to hear aloud. An affirmation of sorts that a person never thinks they need until it’s offered their way. There’s a card in the woman’s hand, pristine white in color with black scrawl on the back and Lexie takes it gladly. “If you are ever in New York give me a call. We would love to have you, Dr. Grey.”
Lexie smiles quietly and blushes her thanks and that’s that.
It’s funny, she’ll think later, because she hadn’t even really done anything at all spectacular that day. It had been a difficult case, sure, a medical mystery of sorts and she may have saved the day with some sort of tidbit of information she’d had floating around in her head (perks of having a photographic memory) but mostly she had kept her head down and did her job the best way she knew how. She scrubbed in, assisted during the surgery, and it was just like any other day at Seattle Grace, nothing particularly out of the ordinary.
It’s always been there, the idea of leaving Seattle behind, leaving the gloom and rain for sunshine and a different (better) life. But at first there was always her father and his problems that were suddenly made her problems the day Molly had looked at her and said I just can’t. The day Lexie decided to play the role of big sister the best she knew how and said don’t worry and had understand, sort of, that things like babies and husbands outweighed others. Lexie had understood and did what she did best and took it in stride. Kept moving with one foot in front of the other. While the adjustment had been initially difficult, an uphill battle of sorts as she struggled to find her footing in this brand new world that didn’t seem to hold a place for her, it eventually became better with time. Somewhere down the line Meredith had started to acknowledge her with something other than utter distaste, she made friends and developed relationships with people other than George, Mark came along and changed just about everything. For the most part things in this moment are looking up.
For the most part she’s happy.
“You’re in a good mood.”
She’s sitting on the edge of the bed, TV on low in the background, toeing her shoes off. She smiles towards Mark softly and pulls her sweater over her head, tossing it to the side. In the back of her mind she’s entertaining the idea. The plausibility of it all. She wonders, fleetingly, if she asked him to pick up everything, if she asked him to give up his life here and move across the country, for her, what he would say. What exactly it is that he would do. They had talked about it sometime before, somewhere in the beginning, maybe, when they bonded over their mutual distaste for Seattle, over the fact that they never really came here on their own free will, over the fact that it was because of somebody, because of something.
“I got offered a job today,” she says quietly, falling backwards on the bed. He’s leaning against the doorway of the bathroom and when she turns her head to look over at him he is raising an eyebrow. She hadn’t even intended on telling him, hadn’t really intended on telling anyone, and she hates the way the words fall out of her mouth, the way his mouth presses into a frown.
“What do you mean you got offered a job?”
“Dr. Roberts said that if I ever moved to New York I should look her up.” Lexie pushes herself upwards and uses her toes to push her socks off her feet. “So not really a job offer,” she amends, and Mark is crossing the room towards her. He sighs. She thinks it may be something similar to relief, but she isn’t sure. “But still.”
There’s a pause and he hesitates and Lexie knows he’s choosing his words carefully. He does this with her sometimes, still, even after all this time. She doesn’t know what it’ll take to get him to realize he doesn’t need to filter himself with her. She loves him as is.
Finally he smiles, wide and brilliant as he stands in front of her now. “You did have a good day.”
Reaching forward she hooks her thumbs through the front loops of his jeans. She smiles up at him in appreciation. “You know what would make it even better?”
Mark is laughing when she kisses him and her grin curves against his as she leans back on the bed again, pulling him with her. There is the mutual arching of backs, the skin sliding against skin. Later, maybe, as they’re falling asleep he will whisper something akin to I’m proud of you and she will smile and breathe and count his breaths as she falls asleep.
In the morning she will take the card and shove it the back of one of her drawers. It will remain mixed in with her panties and socks, under camisoles and her gym shorts. It will serve as a reminder of sorts, another affirmation, concrete this time. Lexie will carry it with her, an acknowledgement that Meredith isn’t the only Grey going places; a vague notion of what could be if she truly wanted it.
And for then, right then, it’s enough.
___
Things happen after that in rather quick succession.
Two days later the competition for the sparkle pager commences. Lexie lives and breathes the hospital and medicine, lives day to day praying for a medical mystery, sleeps in the on-call room and functions mostly from cup of coffee to cup of coffee. Two weeks after that Meredith hands it over to her, all shuffling feet and stuttering in the most non-ceremonial way possible, but in the end, after, Meredith smiles and there is almost a hint of pride lingering in the background somewhere and Lexie can’t help but take stock in it.
In the end, she smiles back.
A few months after that she is the first to land a solo surgery, an appendectomy (the irony is noted) and she is flawless, methodical almost, and it goes perfectly.
After, she peels her gloves off one by one, looks up and see’s Mark watching from the galley, lips curling into a proud smile. Later, there are drinks, and after that they have victory sex in the shower all smiles and giggles and whispered declarations. In bed, as she straddles the edge between consciousness and sleep she realizes, vaguely, that her life right now, in this moment, is pretty much as close to perfect as it is ever going to be. She has her job, Mark, and her father is trying his hand at therapy, at something similar to sobriety and things are the best they’ve been in a long, long time.
Lexie sighs something soft, something wistful and Mark presses his lips somewhere near the nape of her neck.
There is the smallest smile playing at the corners of her mouth when she finally falls asleep.
